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An Update Which Is On Time!
Weekly update time! Now actually on the day I originally planned to write these! Look at me, almost actually being on top of my shit.
I still feel like I was on top of stuff this past week, but in that cutting-corners fashion where you do the bare minimum possible and it (generally) works out. I subsisted on leftovers and food my housemate bought and offered to me for dinner every day during the week and I have no regrets.
Tuesday was the only anticipated-to-be-nice day for the whole week so I kicked my ass to go ride my bike that afternoon before it started raining. I did one less loop around the lake than I usually do because a few droplets were starting to come down, but did make it home maybe half an hour before the rain started in earnest, so like! Success!!
Wednesday I actually did my grocery shopping! I proceeded not to eat any of the actual new food I'd bought, but I did also procure ingredients to bake a cheesecake, so clearly I had my priorities in order.
I really meant to write like... Every day during the week but never managed, because there are presently six people in my house including myself; my housemate Raino is moving out a week into June, and San's girlfriend Janet is moving in, but in the meantime Raino AND his girlfriend AND San AND Janet are all in the house and it is... Far too many people. It's workable in the short term but it makes it really difficult to find a quiet place to write, and I would have written OUTSIDE but it was RAINY AND WET ALL WEEK.
I've been tiredly prodding at myself for weeks now about my need to find a form of exercise I can do indoors, because of the thing where I only really swim and bike outside and in the winter I get really depressed about not being active. So on Thursday I finally nudged myself into doing a little thirty minute yoga routine and it was... Really nice... I cannot believe it took me more than a quarter of a century to really put it together that PHYSICAL ACTIVITY MAKES ME FEEL NICE.
(I mean, I've always liked to hike and be outside and would swim at least a little every summer, but I never really... Thought about it in a mental health context along the lines of "doing this puts me in a good state of mind, and if I go too long without doing this my mental health suffers" until these past couple years.)
And then finally! On Friday! I was able to write!! I kicked my ass to figure out somewhere in the Wheaton area where I could buy myself food and sit for several hours and in the end that place was just, IHOP. But it was a really cute tiny little IHOP and my servers were really nice to me and brought me like fifty fruit sodas, and I tipped them like 50% on my bill because the actual bill was pretty laughably small and I'd been there for more than three hours. And I wrote! A lot!! I think I wrote about 2.5k words (which cracks up to two scenes for the fic) and that's not bad, considering I was also using a fraction of my three hours to eat. It felt really satisfying, on a day that was otherwise gray and rainy and nasty.
Saturday I'd had plans to see friends, who unfortunately had to cancel. So I used Saturday to bake my cheesecake instead! I'd really wanted chocolate raspberry cheesecake and I can't even BUY the cheesecake I want because it was something The Cheesecake Factory USED to sell but no longer has on the menu. I didn't end up trying to duplicate their recipe but instead made a cheesecake with a chocolate graham cracker crust, a thick layer of chocolate-raspberry cheesecake filling, and a thinner layer of almond-flavored cheesecake on top which I had food colored yellow.
I made the cheesecake more because I wanted to than for Sanada's birthday, but I'd REALLY wanted to decorate it with Rikkai's colors and logo so the timing just... Worked out. I left it in the fridge overnight, decorated it on Monday, and was just in time to eat it for Sanada's birthday. Happy day of birth, fukubuchou, this one's for you.
I also went to visit my father Saturday night, while my cheesecake was chilling, lol. We swung by the H-Mart and picked up fish and had a nice dinner together, and in the morning we went driving! I'm getting better!! We've driven in residential areas several times, but by necessity that means never going more than 25 MPH. And dad was saying last time that there's really nothing involved driving from his house to mine that's more complicated than I should be able to handle... Except for the thing where even on less major roads / not the limited access highway, the speed limit is higher than I've ever gone. (And, y'know, there are actually stoplights. But dad forgot about that.) So my request to him was to plan a route on less-traveled back roads where the speed limit was 35 or so, to let me just DRIVE NOT IN A NEIGHBORHOOD.
And the cool thing is, my dad used to own a motorcycle and would drive a lot on back roads. So he took me to an area he used to like to ride on, and it was nice practice both at maintaining my speed (something I hadn't really had to worry about in neighborhoods never going above 25 MPH) and handling the vehicle on winding roads which frequently had limited visibility and sharp, more-or-less 90-degree turns. And it was! Really fun!! I'm just... Genuinely really happy that now that my shit brain isn't LITERALLY ON FIRE driving is ENJOYABLE rather than something that makes me want to vomit myself inside out from stress and anxiety.
I also drove back to dad's house, on a state road where the speed limit is usually 40 MPH but for a stretch we were on, goes up to 50 MPH. And it was also fun! And I didn't do anything stupid or alarming!! We drove for 90 minutes and the entire time I like... Took two turns in ways that were dumb and did one other stupid thing dad told me was stupid but mostly managed to be a functional human being operating a vehicle. Exciting!
I wish it wasn't so inconvenient to visit my dad because I want... To drive more... And I keep thinking about other people I could bully into driving with me who might be more accessible (or just accessible at different times, to increase how often I practice) but I really just... Want to drive with my dad. He's a good teacher and is very familiar with our area and has been very good at finding nice places for me to practice. I like that he listens to me when I say what I want to work on and what is probably still too stressful or challenging for someone with my limited experience and it's just, nice. I am happy to be learning this skill.
And then after we finished driving we went home, changed, and went to the pool because this past Sunday was when dad's pool opens for the summer!! I swam laps, and floated in the diving well when the lifeguards opened it for the children to splash around in, and lounged around in the not-lap-area during adult swim when all the kids were kicked out, it was excellent. (And then I laid down on the warm concrete pool deck and did a small yoga because I am literally a plant and wanted to sun myself, this is just who I am as a person.)
I had more fish for dinner with dad, and went home in time to watch Dream Live 2017 with Samy and Hedge and June and Yrin and that was! Also very nice!! Afterward Hedge and Samy and I also watched the first two episodes of Dansui because Hedge needed to see it and I am Weak and wanted to see my precious swim son I accidentally adopted, Harumi, again. And also Anzai as Reo, I love. Anzai, and I hate that I now have one whole small actor bias.
And Samy also brought up Kimi wa Petto and this time the war flashback hit me, so I now remember both that I watched the entire original drama and that it emotionally compromised me and I'm ANGRY because now we need to watch the 2017 reboot together, I AM NOT DOING THIS ALONE, AND SAMY /DID THIS TO ME,/ THE BLOOD PACT IS SIGNED WE SUFFER TOGETHER, etc. Can't wait to watch this drama and die.
Almost the entirety of Monday was spent on the Rikkai cheesecake, I finished it and ate it and washed my sheets and basically nothing else of value was accomplished. (I also got allergy shots and bubble tea with mom and folded laundry and watched the new episode of darlifra but, clearly that doesn't matter.) And I did do a small yoga before bed, again.
Thursday / Saturday / Monday for yoga is a pretty good pattern, like. I could aim for it being an everyday thing but if I do that I'll really beat myself up when I fail. Aiming for like... Three or four times a week is probably more reasonable.
Today was supposed to be the nice day and Monday was supposed to be the rain, as of LAST week's weather forecast, but unfortunately it didn't work out that way and today is RAINY AND DISGUSTING. So I guess I'm not going to bike when I get home... Which is just as well, because I still have a lot of housechores I want to do before I leave for Boston tomorrow, and this is my last chance to do them.
Anyway!! That was my week, thank you for playing along at home. I'm still screaming nervously about finishing my big bang story in the roughly forty days I have left, but I'm feeling pretty good about the amount of exercise and writing that's been going on in my life lately. I think it's made me feel a lot happier.
I still feel like I was on top of stuff this past week, but in that cutting-corners fashion where you do the bare minimum possible and it (generally) works out. I subsisted on leftovers and food my housemate bought and offered to me for dinner every day during the week and I have no regrets.
Tuesday was the only anticipated-to-be-nice day for the whole week so I kicked my ass to go ride my bike that afternoon before it started raining. I did one less loop around the lake than I usually do because a few droplets were starting to come down, but did make it home maybe half an hour before the rain started in earnest, so like! Success!!
Wednesday I actually did my grocery shopping! I proceeded not to eat any of the actual new food I'd bought, but I did also procure ingredients to bake a cheesecake, so clearly I had my priorities in order.
I really meant to write like... Every day during the week but never managed, because there are presently six people in my house including myself; my housemate Raino is moving out a week into June, and San's girlfriend Janet is moving in, but in the meantime Raino AND his girlfriend AND San AND Janet are all in the house and it is... Far too many people. It's workable in the short term but it makes it really difficult to find a quiet place to write, and I would have written OUTSIDE but it was RAINY AND WET ALL WEEK.
I've been tiredly prodding at myself for weeks now about my need to find a form of exercise I can do indoors, because of the thing where I only really swim and bike outside and in the winter I get really depressed about not being active. So on Thursday I finally nudged myself into doing a little thirty minute yoga routine and it was... Really nice... I cannot believe it took me more than a quarter of a century to really put it together that PHYSICAL ACTIVITY MAKES ME FEEL NICE.
(I mean, I've always liked to hike and be outside and would swim at least a little every summer, but I never really... Thought about it in a mental health context along the lines of "doing this puts me in a good state of mind, and if I go too long without doing this my mental health suffers" until these past couple years.)
And then finally! On Friday! I was able to write!! I kicked my ass to figure out somewhere in the Wheaton area where I could buy myself food and sit for several hours and in the end that place was just, IHOP. But it was a really cute tiny little IHOP and my servers were really nice to me and brought me like fifty fruit sodas, and I tipped them like 50% on my bill because the actual bill was pretty laughably small and I'd been there for more than three hours. And I wrote! A lot!! I think I wrote about 2.5k words (which cracks up to two scenes for the fic) and that's not bad, considering I was also using a fraction of my three hours to eat. It felt really satisfying, on a day that was otherwise gray and rainy and nasty.
Saturday I'd had plans to see friends, who unfortunately had to cancel. So I used Saturday to bake my cheesecake instead! I'd really wanted chocolate raspberry cheesecake and I can't even BUY the cheesecake I want because it was something The Cheesecake Factory USED to sell but no longer has on the menu. I didn't end up trying to duplicate their recipe but instead made a cheesecake with a chocolate graham cracker crust, a thick layer of chocolate-raspberry cheesecake filling, and a thinner layer of almond-flavored cheesecake on top which I had food colored yellow.
I made the cheesecake more because I wanted to than for Sanada's birthday, but I'd REALLY wanted to decorate it with Rikkai's colors and logo so the timing just... Worked out. I left it in the fridge overnight, decorated it on Monday, and was just in time to eat it for Sanada's birthday. Happy day of birth, fukubuchou, this one's for you.
I also went to visit my father Saturday night, while my cheesecake was chilling, lol. We swung by the H-Mart and picked up fish and had a nice dinner together, and in the morning we went driving! I'm getting better!! We've driven in residential areas several times, but by necessity that means never going more than 25 MPH. And dad was saying last time that there's really nothing involved driving from his house to mine that's more complicated than I should be able to handle... Except for the thing where even on less major roads / not the limited access highway, the speed limit is higher than I've ever gone. (And, y'know, there are actually stoplights. But dad forgot about that.) So my request to him was to plan a route on less-traveled back roads where the speed limit was 35 or so, to let me just DRIVE NOT IN A NEIGHBORHOOD.
And the cool thing is, my dad used to own a motorcycle and would drive a lot on back roads. So he took me to an area he used to like to ride on, and it was nice practice both at maintaining my speed (something I hadn't really had to worry about in neighborhoods never going above 25 MPH) and handling the vehicle on winding roads which frequently had limited visibility and sharp, more-or-less 90-degree turns. And it was! Really fun!! I'm just... Genuinely really happy that now that my shit brain isn't LITERALLY ON FIRE driving is ENJOYABLE rather than something that makes me want to vomit myself inside out from stress and anxiety.
I also drove back to dad's house, on a state road where the speed limit is usually 40 MPH but for a stretch we were on, goes up to 50 MPH. And it was also fun! And I didn't do anything stupid or alarming!! We drove for 90 minutes and the entire time I like... Took two turns in ways that were dumb and did one other stupid thing dad told me was stupid but mostly managed to be a functional human being operating a vehicle. Exciting!
I wish it wasn't so inconvenient to visit my dad because I want... To drive more... And I keep thinking about other people I could bully into driving with me who might be more accessible (or just accessible at different times, to increase how often I practice) but I really just... Want to drive with my dad. He's a good teacher and is very familiar with our area and has been very good at finding nice places for me to practice. I like that he listens to me when I say what I want to work on and what is probably still too stressful or challenging for someone with my limited experience and it's just, nice. I am happy to be learning this skill.
And then after we finished driving we went home, changed, and went to the pool because this past Sunday was when dad's pool opens for the summer!! I swam laps, and floated in the diving well when the lifeguards opened it for the children to splash around in, and lounged around in the not-lap-area during adult swim when all the kids were kicked out, it was excellent. (And then I laid down on the warm concrete pool deck and did a small yoga because I am literally a plant and wanted to sun myself, this is just who I am as a person.)
I had more fish for dinner with dad, and went home in time to watch Dream Live 2017 with Samy and Hedge and June and Yrin and that was! Also very nice!! Afterward Hedge and Samy and I also watched the first two episodes of Dansui because Hedge needed to see it and I am Weak and wanted to see my precious swim son I accidentally adopted, Harumi, again. And also Anzai as Reo, I love. Anzai, and I hate that I now have one whole small actor bias.
And Samy also brought up Kimi wa Petto and this time the war flashback hit me, so I now remember both that I watched the entire original drama and that it emotionally compromised me and I'm ANGRY because now we need to watch the 2017 reboot together, I AM NOT DOING THIS ALONE, AND SAMY /DID THIS TO ME,/ THE BLOOD PACT IS SIGNED WE SUFFER TOGETHER, etc. Can't wait to watch this drama and die.
Almost the entirety of Monday was spent on the Rikkai cheesecake, I finished it and ate it and washed my sheets and basically nothing else of value was accomplished. (I also got allergy shots and bubble tea with mom and folded laundry and watched the new episode of darlifra but, clearly that doesn't matter.) And I did do a small yoga before bed, again.
Thursday / Saturday / Monday for yoga is a pretty good pattern, like. I could aim for it being an everyday thing but if I do that I'll really beat myself up when I fail. Aiming for like... Three or four times a week is probably more reasonable.
Today was supposed to be the nice day and Monday was supposed to be the rain, as of LAST week's weather forecast, but unfortunately it didn't work out that way and today is RAINY AND DISGUSTING. So I guess I'm not going to bike when I get home... Which is just as well, because I still have a lot of housechores I want to do before I leave for Boston tomorrow, and this is my last chance to do them.
Anyway!! That was my week, thank you for playing along at home. I'm still screaming nervously about finishing my big bang story in the roughly forty days I have left, but I'm feeling pretty good about the amount of exercise and writing that's been going on in my life lately. I think it's made me feel a lot happier.