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A Post-Hiatus Update
I keep feeling like I should write an update, but I keep not actually feeling like DOING it, or knowing what I would even write the update about.
I did end my twitter hiatus, though, and I think that contributes to both the "what I would talk about" and "why I don't want to" lol.
It's sort of, hilarious to me, but in a sad way, that I wrote my last hiatus update and was very secure in my plan to schedule and limit my twitter use only to... Pretty much immediately fail to do that in any way, shape, or form. I am frustrated with myself for failing so spectacularly to stick to my guns, but I'm also just... Rolling with it, because my overall, primary goal always has always just been, "feel good and take care of yourself."
And that isn't going terribly. This week feels like everything is all mixed up and out of order, which is very much a possibility for something that could happen, because my work very much operates on a weekly schedule. But despite feeling all over the place with it, almost all of my work routines happened on the correct days and at about the right times. I feel disoriented even though nothing is out of place and I keep pondering whether it's the fact that I started checking twitter fifty times a day again, but. I feel like doing that is more the product of having free time and already being disoriented, than the reason for the disorientation, for once.
Brains are fucking weird. And I guess also there's the thing where I haven't slept more than six consecutive hours a night in over a week.
Usually I sleep MAYBE six hours a night on weeknights, and make up the little sleep deficit every weekend. But this past weekend my body was VERY EXCITED!!! to wake up by seven every morning even though I absoluuuuutely didn't have to and like... Thanks for nothing you useless sack of meat. I never made up my deficit so I've spent the entire week being kind of out of it from sleep deprivation, what's up.
I guess this update, despite being a disorganized hot mess, is useful after all because it sure is helping sort out why I've felt like I'm slowly falling down stairs all week, lol.
And I fought with a friend at the start of the week but I'd sort of already forgotten about that.
What else.
I started watching Mobile Suit Gundam: Iron Blooded Orphans! I'd meant to watch it for ages but only got around to it on Kat's recommendation, because I'm gently trying to lead her into Prince of Tennis and I feel like if she takes me up on that recommendation I owe her some kind of fandom reciprocity, because god knows tenipuri is A Fucking Commitment. (And I mean, I as a person am generally not good at watching stuff For another person, but this was something I'd been wanting to watch for myself anyway and I am good at taking a kick in the PANTS because another person delivered it.)
I mainlined a ton of the anime last Friday so I've watched 17 episodes at present, but after the initial nine or ten episode binge I watched it in two-episode chunks so I'm thinking my rate of consumption is going to slow way down to about that rate, every few days, as I have time. I'm really enjoying it! No one told me about the space yakuza! I fucking love the space yakuza!! But I also have always loved the sorts of things Gundam series want to say about war and human nature and sacrifice so I'm just, going to have a good time dying on that thematic hill overall.
My doujinshi tried to arrive on Tuesday but the delivery happened during the maybe 20 minute window when my housemate was out of the house, so the new plan is that I will be picking them up from the post office in about three hours and hopefully nothing goes wrong with that because I am EXCITED TO TOUCH MY BOOKS!!
One of my local friends got a new job and is going to have a regular 9-5 weekday type schedule like me and I'm both very excited for her and additionally excited that now our schedules will line up. She asked me about going for walks in nature so the current plan is, if the weather really is nice on Sunday and nothing comes up, to go hiking at Great Falls this weekend. I'm looking forward to it!
And then I have my dentist appointment on Monday. Even though I like this new dentist much more than my old one I'm getting nervous about it, because I expect them to yell at me when they do my cleaning since that's just, what always happened. Like, yes I know everything is bad I have not had a professional cleaning in like maybe four years, please just make it good again and then I will try to come at least once a year, twice if my insurance actually covers that. (Frankly I will come as many times as someone else will pay for, lol.)
Also I am super not looking forward to actually paying for my crown, they let me off the hook last time because they were still figuring out how much of THAT insurance covers but I know it's not a very high percentage of the overall sticker price and just, ughhhhhh money.
I've spent kind of a lot of money all told on doujinshi and tea and wine lately and I know I'm likely to spend even more when I'm in Boston in April because I know I'll eat out a lot. My natural inclination is to feel guilty about it because none of these purchases were Necessary but I'm trying to have some chill and allow myself to just, buy and have nice things sometimes. The only things I really spend money on for myself are books, yarn, and travel to see friends, I'm not a frivolous person and generally I can actually afford it.
And that's it, I guess! I feel like I'm forgetting stuff and dropping the ball on things, both in this entry and just in LIFE, but I'm? Probably not? Honestly?? Even if I'm a frazzled mess I suspect I'm doing pretty okay.
I did end my twitter hiatus, though, and I think that contributes to both the "what I would talk about" and "why I don't want to" lol.
It's sort of, hilarious to me, but in a sad way, that I wrote my last hiatus update and was very secure in my plan to schedule and limit my twitter use only to... Pretty much immediately fail to do that in any way, shape, or form. I am frustrated with myself for failing so spectacularly to stick to my guns, but I'm also just... Rolling with it, because my overall, primary goal always has always just been, "feel good and take care of yourself."
And that isn't going terribly. This week feels like everything is all mixed up and out of order, which is very much a possibility for something that could happen, because my work very much operates on a weekly schedule. But despite feeling all over the place with it, almost all of my work routines happened on the correct days and at about the right times. I feel disoriented even though nothing is out of place and I keep pondering whether it's the fact that I started checking twitter fifty times a day again, but. I feel like doing that is more the product of having free time and already being disoriented, than the reason for the disorientation, for once.
Brains are fucking weird. And I guess also there's the thing where I haven't slept more than six consecutive hours a night in over a week.
Usually I sleep MAYBE six hours a night on weeknights, and make up the little sleep deficit every weekend. But this past weekend my body was VERY EXCITED!!! to wake up by seven every morning even though I absoluuuuutely didn't have to and like... Thanks for nothing you useless sack of meat. I never made up my deficit so I've spent the entire week being kind of out of it from sleep deprivation, what's up.
I guess this update, despite being a disorganized hot mess, is useful after all because it sure is helping sort out why I've felt like I'm slowly falling down stairs all week, lol.
And I fought with a friend at the start of the week but I'd sort of already forgotten about that.
What else.
I started watching Mobile Suit Gundam: Iron Blooded Orphans! I'd meant to watch it for ages but only got around to it on Kat's recommendation, because I'm gently trying to lead her into Prince of Tennis and I feel like if she takes me up on that recommendation I owe her some kind of fandom reciprocity, because god knows tenipuri is A Fucking Commitment. (And I mean, I as a person am generally not good at watching stuff For another person, but this was something I'd been wanting to watch for myself anyway and I am good at taking a kick in the PANTS because another person delivered it.)
I mainlined a ton of the anime last Friday so I've watched 17 episodes at present, but after the initial nine or ten episode binge I watched it in two-episode chunks so I'm thinking my rate of consumption is going to slow way down to about that rate, every few days, as I have time. I'm really enjoying it! No one told me about the space yakuza! I fucking love the space yakuza!! But I also have always loved the sorts of things Gundam series want to say about war and human nature and sacrifice so I'm just, going to have a good time dying on that thematic hill overall.
My doujinshi tried to arrive on Tuesday but the delivery happened during the maybe 20 minute window when my housemate was out of the house, so the new plan is that I will be picking them up from the post office in about three hours and hopefully nothing goes wrong with that because I am EXCITED TO TOUCH MY BOOKS!!
One of my local friends got a new job and is going to have a regular 9-5 weekday type schedule like me and I'm both very excited for her and additionally excited that now our schedules will line up. She asked me about going for walks in nature so the current plan is, if the weather really is nice on Sunday and nothing comes up, to go hiking at Great Falls this weekend. I'm looking forward to it!
And then I have my dentist appointment on Monday. Even though I like this new dentist much more than my old one I'm getting nervous about it, because I expect them to yell at me when they do my cleaning since that's just, what always happened. Like, yes I know everything is bad I have not had a professional cleaning in like maybe four years, please just make it good again and then I will try to come at least once a year, twice if my insurance actually covers that. (Frankly I will come as many times as someone else will pay for, lol.)
Also I am super not looking forward to actually paying for my crown, they let me off the hook last time because they were still figuring out how much of THAT insurance covers but I know it's not a very high percentage of the overall sticker price and just, ughhhhhh money.
I've spent kind of a lot of money all told on doujinshi and tea and wine lately and I know I'm likely to spend even more when I'm in Boston in April because I know I'll eat out a lot. My natural inclination is to feel guilty about it because none of these purchases were Necessary but I'm trying to have some chill and allow myself to just, buy and have nice things sometimes. The only things I really spend money on for myself are books, yarn, and travel to see friends, I'm not a frivolous person and generally I can actually afford it.
And that's it, I guess! I feel like I'm forgetting stuff and dropping the ball on things, both in this entry and just in LIFE, but I'm? Probably not? Honestly?? Even if I'm a frazzled mess I suspect I'm doing pretty okay.